When I think about what it means to love fearlessly, I think of the patron saint of Ireland, St. Patrick. Many people celebrate St. Patrick’s life and work as a missionary and priest each year on March 17th. He is known as the “Apostle of Ireland” for being among the first to successfully spread the gospel message throughout Ireland in the 5th century, until which time it had been a mostly pagan nation.
What many people do not know is that St. Patrick wasn’t even Irish! According to “The Real St. Patrick,” an article written by Ted Olsen for Christianity Today, “Patrick was 16 years old in about the year 405, when he was captured in a raid and became a slave in what was still radically pagan Ireland.” He was kidnapped from his home in what’s now Dumbarton, Scotland, and forced to work as a herdsman in Ireland.
It was during this time of bondage to his captors that St. Patrick’s relationship with the Lord was cultivated and ultimately matured. God used difficult circumstances to draw St. Patrick closer to Him. After six long years of bondage spent mostly in prayer, St. Patrick escaped his captors and finally returned home to his parents. As the story goes, though, the Lord called St. Patrick to return to Ireland some years later, likely when in his mid-forties, to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with the very same people who had abducted and enslaved him!
Can you imagine? God called St. Patrick to love his enemies in a way that is hard for most of us to fathom. As a child, I was sensitive, quiet, and shy, but also quick to become defensive if I felt misunderstood or hurt emotionally. My Irish-Catholic grandfather used to say to me, “Stay on the offense, not the defense!” I believe this was his way of encouraging me not to get angry and defensive with people who accuse me or fail to love me the way I wish they would, but to remain calm and secure with who and whose I am instead. It was also his way of telling me not to be timid and afraid in my approach with people, but rather bold and fearless. His words remind me of the way St. Patrick chose to love the people of Ireland.
While St. Patrick could have easily taken a self-protective, defensive stance and refuse to return to Ireland for fear of what his former heathen captors might do to him, he didn’t. Instead, he took an offensive approach. Allowing Jesus’ love for the unsaved people of Ireland to fill his heart, St. Patrick was emboldened to step out in faith, and boldly proclaim the name of Jesus to the broken, the hurting, and the lost. Selflessly, he loved the people of Ireland more than he loved his own life—and praise God he did! As a result of St. Patrick’s decision to love fearlessly, a nation of people was saved for eternity! Jesus has called each of us to love others in this way.
I believe God wants us to understand that no matter how dark or painful our circumstances may be, or how intense the opposition to our faith—we always have a choice as to how we will respond: in fear or in love. When we react in fear, we will tend to respond defensively, putting up walls of self-protection around us. This keeps us from being able to continue loving those around us, as well as receiving love from others. On the other hand, when we respond in love, courageously and compassionately, we will be empowered to release responsibility for our protection to God, trusting Him to come to our defense (see Isaiah 52:12). We will come to rely on God’s perfect love to fill us, rather than the imperfect love of other people. This will free us to focus on loving those whom God has called us to love, joyfully and wholeheartedly.
Personally, I have learned in my struggle with the fear of rejection and abandonment that I can be tempted to withhold my love from people. Having been deeply hurt by people who have neglected to love me, rejected, or abandoned me, it can feel safer to put up walls of self-protection around my heart rather than risk vulnerability, opening myself up to further pain. I may say to myself, because they don’t fill my cup, I will no longer fill theirs—and continue the cycle of rejection and abandonment. However, this wouldn’t be the right response, because as painful as it sometimes is to love them, I know these are people in my life whom God has called me to continue to love fearlessly.
Rather than fear their rejection and abandonment, I choose to remember that Jesus took up the pain of my being rejected and abandoned and laid it upon Himself so I would never have to carry the weight of that pain ever again. I can remember His unfailing love and acceptance, and—instead of looking to other people to fill my cup and make me feel whole—I can let go of the unholy expectations I’ve had of others and look to God, whose perfect love will always be enough to meet my every need. This will allow me the freedom to continue to love without fear. (Note: This doesn’t include abusive people from whom you need to keep a safe distance, or those with a pattern of hurtful or harmful behavior with whom you establish boundaries to protect your physical, financial, emotional, and spiritual health. You may choose to love these individuals from a distance by praying for them, for example, or in other ways that don’t compromise your health and safety, depending on your relationship with them.)
I believe this is the offensive position my grandfather encouraged me to take. It seems both St. Patrick and my grandfather understood what I’m still learning to live out: we can be joy-filled and free in choosing to love fearlessly, knowing we are completely covered and protected by God’s perfect love! Yes, to love fearlessly comes with risk, but it’s a risk worth taking when God’s with you, guiding you in it.
