Do you know Pain?  Of course you do.  We all do.  She has been present in all of our lives at one point or another.  For some, she comes, and stays, only for a short while.  She may show up when you experience a hurtful word from another, or when you bang your knee on the corner of the coffee table.  For others, Pain’s visits have become extended stays.  She shows up in a broken relationship, a season of financial uncertainty, or when you experience the death of a loved one.  Pain doesn’t come and go in these situations, but lingers.  Then, there are those who experience chronic physical Pain.  Not everyone knows this side of Pain.  This Pain can be both physical and emotional.  She is like the house guest who has overstayed her welcome.  You tried to be nice, but now you are done!  You made room for her, but it seems like she is trying to take over the whole house!  Why won’t she leave?!  Your house was peaceful, put together, restful, and in good working order until she came along.  Not only that, but she has invited some of her annoying friends over to party without permission.  Chaos, Confusion, Fatigue, Stress, Frustration, Disappointment, Anxiety, and Depression have all come to wreak havoc.  Will your life ever be the same again?  Can peace still be found in the midst of Pain?

If you are experiencing chronic pain, whether emotional, physical, or both– I want to encourage you that peace can still be found; even in the midst of pain.  I have struggled with chronic physical pain for the last 13 years.  One year after I got married, I came down with a chronic inflammatory condition of the bladder called, Interstitial Cystitis.  For the first several years, my pain level was high.  Actually, the only time I didn’t feel severe pain was when I was asleep.  I would drag myself through work each day, afraid that at some point, I may not be able to work at all.  I wondered, “Will we be able to support ourselves if I can’t work?”  “Will I always be in this much pain?”  Debilitating pain has a way of stealing joy and peace.  It not only affected my work life, but also my relationships.  My marriage was hit hardest of all.  One symptom of Interstitial Cystitis is pain with sexual intercourse.  Not too go into too much intimate detail, but my husband and I were unable to make love during the first two years I suffered with this condition.  The pain was absolutely unbearable.  As a result, what started out as physical pain, quickly became intensely emotionally painful as well.  Then, fear found its way into the mix.  Fearful thoughts began running rampant through my mind.  “Would my husband leave me?”  “Did he love me enough to stay?”

My husband had waited until marriage to have sex for the first time.  I cannot same the same, unfortunately.  And yet, I had turned a corner before meeting my husband.  I had rededicated my life to God.  I was no longer looking for love in all the wrong places because I had finally come to understand, I was loved by God.  The lack of fulfillment I had experienced for so long, the gaping hole in my life, was completely filled in the perfect love of God.  So, why did it feel like my past was finally catching up to me.  It’s not that I had been trying to run from it, but I quickly discovered I hadn’t really healed from it either.  I knew I had been forgiven, but because I hadn’t yet forgiven myself or understood my identity in Christ, I became vulnerable to the enemy’s attacks.  The enemy will always try to remind you of your past.  He will shame you into believing lies about your true identity.  If you don’t know who you are in Christ Jesus, completely forgiven and clothed in the His righteousness, you will fall right into his trap.  I felt like such a disappointment to my husband, and so unworthy of being loved.  The enemy used this as an opportunity to heap shame upon my wounded heart, and I was left drowning in a pool of my own tears, scared for my future, and desperate.  I cried out for mercy.  I didn’t think I could live with this kind of pain; physically or emotionally.  The pain I experienced during those first few years of marriage, I wouldn’t wish upon anyone.

As I’ve grown in my faith in God, I have gained a better understanding of what is needed in order to experience peace in the midst of pain– it’s an understanding of God’s grace.  My pastor, Dr. Jim Garlow of Skyline Church, recently preached on grace.  He defined grace as, “God’s willingness to demonstrate His power in my behalf, though I don’t deserve it.”  Ever since sin entered the world through Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, there has been pain, suffering, and death.  Our sin separates us from God, but God longs to be in relationship with us.  So, He made a way!  Though we don’t deserve it, God sent His only son Jesus, to pay the penalty once, death on a cross, for all our sin, so we could have a right relationship with Him.  When we choose to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, and invite Him into our lives, God sees the righteousness of Jesus Christ in us, and not the shame of our sin.  It means that, though we are weak, we are clothed with strength and dignity because of Jesus.  That which causes pain, physically and emotionally, has no hold on those whose victory is found in having made Jesus Christ Lord and Savior of their lives.  What death declares utter hopelessness, the blood of Jesus conquerors and proclaims life, and triumphant victory in His name.

God made a way for us, not only to spend eternity with Him in heaven, but to experience peace in our present circumstances because of the hope we have in Him.  The Bible says in John 16:33, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace.  In this world you will have trouble.  But take heart!  I have overcome the world.”  We have an advocate, Jesus Christ, who is constantly interceding for us, but will we trust Him to meet our needs?  When you are struggling, and wonder how you will make it through, remember what God told Paul in response to his pleading with God to remove the thorn in his side.  God said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Corinthians 12:9).  This wasn’t God saying to Paul, “Sorry, you get what you get.”  I believe this was God saying, “I will meet your every need.”  “You are more than a conqueror in Christ.”  “If you only knew all that I have prepared for you.  My plans are to prosper you and not to harm you; plans to give you hope and a future.”  “I will sustain you.”  “You can do all things through Christ who gives you strength.”

In order to experience the peace that passes understanding in the midst of pain, we have to release control of our circumstances, and trust that God is working all things for the good of those that love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.  I may not understand why there is so much suffering in this world, or how God will someday make everything right again, but I can choose by faith to trust that He will.  I can choose to believe He is God, and I am not.  His thoughts are not my thoughts, nor are His ways my ways.  God does not operate within my limited capacity to understand Him or my circumstances.  He sees the big picture!  After thirteen years of pain, I can honestly say, I am better because of it.  I would not have learned all that I have learned without having to go through the fire.  The furnace of affliction brings a level clarity and understanding that cannot be grasped without having experienced it.  I am thankful for the pain because it has brought me so much closer to God.  My flesh may fail, but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion forever.  What I have lost cannot compare to what I have gained.  I have gained a level of compassion and understanding for people who are suffering, and in pain, that I would not have received otherwise.  I am deeply-rooted in God’s love, and at peace, because I know that I am perfectly loved regardless of what my circumstances may be.

God loves you more than you can possibly comprehend.  He watches over your coming and going both now and forever.  He guards you in all of your ways.  He commands His angels concerning you.  Whatever you are going through, may the promises of God, found in His Word, give you peace today and always.

“‘Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,’ says the Lord, who has compassion on you.  ‘Afflicted city, lashed by storms and not comforted, I will rebuild you with stones of turquoise, your foundations with lapis lazuli.  I will make your battlements of rubies, your gates of sparkling jewels, and all your walls of precious stones.  All your children will be taught by the Lord, and great will be their peace.  In righteousness you will be established: Tyranny will be far from you; you will have nothing to fear'” (Isaiah 54:10-14).